Should I start my school year early or late?

This is very different for each family.  The local private schools went back midAugust around our location and the publics went back the 4th Week of August, with labor day this year still two weeks off.  I used to always start the day after labor day.  This year I sit here unprepared and not really wanting to get started.  I know the better organized I am the more we will get done and yet we never do what I organize so it sometimes look like a waste.  I watch the newbies get excited about curriculum and making bold choices to teach or not teach a certain subject.  I am again stuck with my personality wanting to be uber organized and output driven with work sheets and charts but knowing that the kids do not learn that way.   I know my kids learn even in an un-schooling fashion but I still stress and compare myself to others.  "Am I doing enough?  Do I require enough?  Will they be smart enough? What will so in so think if they find out what I do?"  You would think starting year 20 of this homeschool teaching thing would afford me a little more confidence.

I have 11 wonderful children.  The oldest 4 are finished with my instruction.  The oldest is literally a life-saver working as an EMT on an ambulance.  The next three are at community college working on transfer credits.  Most importantly I have raised wonderful people.  They are kind, giving, loving, and Christ centered people that understand HEAVEN is the goal.  That is what I need to focus on all the time.  Our family motto:  HEAVEN IS THE GOAL, EVERYTHING ELSE IS GRAVY!  OK now that I have reminded myself of what is important year 20 can begin with the right focus.

So when should I start my school year?  This year for me it will be soon.  It is important to realize and focus on the goal.  Remember that no matter when you start you kids will not learn everything.  You will never get it all done.  The most important thing to do in a homeschool family is to inspire a spirit of learning and a love of Christ.  Let the kids know their purpose as a child of God and then education will fall into place.  I am not saying that academics are not important because they are extremely important, but in their proper spot.  With the goal in mind, I will start school when it works best for my family.

Still Homeschooling

I am still at this crazy game and the more time I have spent doing it the more I feel I need to learn.  We have three graduated from our T Homeschool Academy with one more graduating this January.  All of those three are in college and doing well in classes in spite of the various learning issues each on has had.  Don't give up, not matter what.  Don't let what others say about you change what you in your heart know to be true.  Don't give up. I have watched too many people back track later and then ask what they did wrong.  I could see all along that they did not stay the course.  Hey it isn't easy out there.  It can get messy.  Laws of the legal system and in-laws of the family system can try to force you to change.  Stay the course, you won't regret it.

Morning Out

Dad works from home.  This has been great at times and a real pain at other times.  J had a very important conference call scheduled.  He needed to give the call his absolute attention.   It was much easier for us to vacate the home for the morning.   After morning Mass I took the crowd to a fun McDonalds (has a play place) for breakfast.

Beautiful - Adorable

It ended up being a fun morning.  The twins are just days from turning one and they had a blast.  Adorable and Beautiful preferred to be together in the tubes. 

I post this to remind us all to enjoy time to have fun.  I know too many homeschoolers that are so super focused on school work that the kids are stressed out.  One dangerous trap is that too often these over focused families loose site of the goal of heaven.  I have seen so many families use an intense programs, then not have time to take breaks and enjoy each other's company.  Some of these families end up with kids that are college drop outs.  Once the kids have a little freedom, they rebel completely.  We all look into the eyes of our little one year old and see the world.  I still see those endless possibilities in my adult children.  They are open to life, all of it - including the learning, the fun, the worship, the joy.  The well rounded person sees the world for that it has to offer not what it can for you.  To my dear fellow homeschooling moms, remember to enjoy your time with the children.  Teach them to seek Heaven in all that they do. In the end it is the only thing that is important.

New School Motto

It is so important to plant an idea in your head of what your goals for your children will be. Years ago we decided that the family motto was: "Heaven is our goal, everything else is just gravy!" Having those words in the back of our minds has helped us through many difficult situations. When a decision needs to be made we resort back to the family motto. I know it isn't pretty and we always planned to reword it but for now it is what it is. The kids all know that Heaven is the goal!


One Sunday during Mass sometime in December of 2008 I was inspired to write something down. I don't know where it came from but the words formed in my mind as I grabbed a pen and scripted it onto some scrap paper in the pew. I don't recall why I wrote it or even doing it. So flash forward an entire year and a month and as I was cleaning off my desk tonight I ran into that little piece of paper. I recognized my handwriting and vaguely remembering writing it down. (So glad I did.) I now know what it is and I like it. Our school motto is a little more formal now. I can’t wait to add it onto Diplomas and transcripts. I love it, it fits us. I think it was a gift from Heaven itself.

Pray about this and pick one for your family and a different one for your home school. It is very good to have a motto or slogan that can rally the troops. So what do you think? I love this one, it really does fit our home school.

Our Home School Motto

T-Academy:

Where the path to Heaven

meets Scholastic Excellence,

all mixed together with Love of Family.

What book have you found to be the most helpful during the course of homeschooling?

There are so many Catholic home schooling books. They all help a little but the book that has given me the most help in these years while the kiddos are at home has nothing to do with home schooling. I Should Have Seen It Coming When The Rabbit Died by Teresa Blomingdale is a book that I go back to over and over again. It was first printed in 1979 and was one of my mom’s paperback books. I read it when the older ones were young because the title looked funny. The author had ten children in 12 years. She was a mom from the late 50s and the 60s. She loved her family and children. She was Catholic and the book is about her experience of having ten children as a Catholic woman. She writes with so much humor and love. Her children all went to Catholic School but her drive and passion for her children is like mine.

After the author tells many amusing and moving tales of her children the book ends with an Epilogue chapter. The title is “The best is yet to be” and this is my favorite part of the book. The author describes various conversations that she had with her father as she grew up. He would always tell her not to worry because the best was yet to be. She was very sad that he passed away before her oldest son got married. She describes how she couldn’t wait for college, then a job, then true love, then marriage, then children etc. etc. etc. She says that she thought watching her young children open gifts at Christmas was the best it could ever be, but her father tells her the “best is yet to be”. She understands that statement more fully later when she enjoys watching her older children helping their younger siblings on another Christmas morning.

The book ends as she looks over the ceremony of her son’s wedding. She ponders how it could ever be better than this moment. A beautiful Mass with her son so in love with his bride on the alter surrounded by all the siblings. Everyone is there dressed to the nines. They are all with God in church and together as a family, except for her deceased father. As she wonders how any moment could ever compare to the joy she feels right then she hears her father whisper to her. She knows he is whispering from heaven to tell her, “The BEST is yet to be.”

There have been many times when things are bad in our family life. Like when we had to decide what to do with the one that needed open heart surgery. There have been many joyous moments. At every one I hear those words and am reminded of heaven. This silly little paperback book written years ago has helped me to remain focused on Him and on heaven. For the my family, heaven is the reason we home school.

What are some reasons you decided to home school?

Year before I met my husband I met an incredible family. This family was unique in that they homeschooled. The mom said that it was because she wanted a stronger faith instruction for her children. These kids were the coolest kids I had ever met. They were all beautiful and smart. They were all very athletic and had an incredible love for life and each other, even the cousins. These were not dorky kids at all. They were a part of the community in their social work, volunteered at church, had jobs and yet were kept home for school.

These teens and young adults went to Mass everyday, they prayed the rosary as a group just about every day, they stomped each other at some game (soccer, football, waffle ball, hoops etc. ) every day. The more I spent time around them the more I wanted to get to know Christ. My faith grew so much just being around these people. Where did that passion come from?

I think it had to do with the fact that they were home schooled. Their moms pulled them out of the strong Catholic school because the faith wasn’t a strong enough part of the day. These were fun people who were real. They could have cared less what I thought of them. I asked my friend where that came from. He said it was home schooling. He was allowed to grow up with confidence because his mom believed in him and he had never heard to the contrary. I was in love with my faith but couldn’t share it like these kids. I decided then I wanted that passion and self confidence for my children if I was ever lucky enough to get married.

Convincing dad was another issue. As it turned out is was God's will. I still thank him for allowing me to see that humble example in my young life.

How has having children with learning disabilities affected the older student/sibling?

That is a very interesting question. Our oldest has never known any different. At times she would follow my example and get angry that they were not catching on. I think she thought, like I did, that they were just lazy and not really trying. That frustrated her to no end. She was also worried about ourside family and what she would say to them. It did become easier for her when we found out about the ‘disabilities’ we were looking at and actually labeled them. She let me do the research but always wanted an update. She often offered her opinions that helped me decide what issues we were dealing with.

She also defended them at times. She was in a girls group for awhile and when the next daughter joined; the other girls made fun of her for not reading. Our oldest wasted no time in defending her sister. She wasn’t embarrassed by her. That would be different if they were in school, I think. Our oldest felt like she had invested herself in raising and teaching her sister right along with me. She felt a little guilty that her sister wasn’t reading, just like like I did. She also saw how hard her sister really worked to read one word, she saw for herself that her sister was very smart even though it didn’t look to this group of girls.

Last year we decided that the math program we were using was too difficult for the ones with the learning issues. I would never have thought that our oldest had learning issues and yet she asked if she could change programs as well. In all of our searching for what worked in the other kiddos the oldest paid close attention to her own learning styles. She now asks for stuff that works better for her. I think that will give her a huge advantage in college. She will know how to search out help if she needs it. Knowing when to ask for help is an important skill to learn in life.

I don't think she is burdened by any of it. I really believe she is a better student based on her siblings and their issues. If anything she has learned the kindness and compasion that we all need to succeed in life. She is closer to heaven having had to learn to deal with it all.

Heaven is the goal!

(originally written in 2005)

So you are home schooling your children and you have had a friend over to play with your 4th grader. This kid is smart. He plays the piano, he is in advanced classes all across the board, you about pass out when he starts quoting a book that you didn’t even read until college. You then look back at your beautiful 10 year old son. This poor boy cannot read at all. It is near impossible to read what he attempts to write. His work is always sloppy and he would do anything to get out of the classroom. You send his friend home and begin to really judge your son. How can he be this lazy and unmotivated? What, how dare you judge your own son that way?

What am I talking about? Your son will need to lead a family some day; he must learn his math and his reading. He will need to provide for a wife and children (God willing) or better yet run a parish, a diocese, or maybe even the entire Catholic Church. Wow, how can you see your little under achiever as the pontiff. Those men need to know several languages and you can not even master English. Maybe you should put him back in school. Will that be the best for him?

Let’s think about that idea for a moment. If your child was in school you would be on his side and not out to point out his faults. Why have you abandoned him? He still needs your support. He still needs you to see his potential. If a teacher was telling you how slow your son is, you would be pointing out how smart he is. You would remind her that he comes home every day sharing what he has learned. You would be pointing out that he is the only one in the family that knows anything about hooking up the DVD player or getting the computers running. He might not be reading but he is brilliant.

Now you are the teacher and the mom. You have to see both sides. You need to see him like Christ does. The Father created your son; of course He knows his faults. Remember our Lord sees the complete package. He sees the child as a temple for the Holy Spirit. He sees the potential and the love. It is so hard, but that is what we are called to see. The math and the reading are very important but Heaven is the real goal. Don’t ever forget that.